sighz... i feeling damn bored now... stupid ann siong... copy me... say what new year's resolution want to get a girlfriend from co... no originality sia... anyway my new year's resolution is:

1) Of course get a girlfriend from co... hopefully from chuida... (ok, i'm laming)
2) Get at most 12 points for o' levels... i very stupid, ok?

haiz... so bored... so i decided to put some of the exchange photos here... haha... ok, enjoy... (for your info there are actually 200+ photos so here are just some of them)

Rg girls on their way to the co room...

Rgco performance

Vsco performance

sighz... woke up at around 12pm... watched romance of the 3 kingdoms yesterday until 1am plus... did some hw before going downstairs to buy lunch... saw ying kai's blog... damn gay... he's also damn gay... dunno how to do his blog himself, must ask people like jing xuan to help him... i think got something going on between the two of them... they two like very close liao or something... received an e-mail from yu ching... she said she wants to bish me (is that even a word?) after i thanked her for giving me the link to the album of pictures from the exchange... i would like to tell her that she can come and bish me (i feel damn lame using that word...) for all i care... i will be waiting for her...

i'm seriously feeling damn pissed now... today was the sec 1 orientation day and it was total crap... the staff who planned this shit did a bloody lousy job... ok... i shall start with this morning...

---VULGARITIES AHEAD, BE WARNED------PEOPLE WHO CAN'T STAND VULGARITIES PLS **** OFF BECAUSE THERE IS GOING TO BE HELL LOT OF VULGARITIES AHEAD---






---YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED---


---****ERS WHO CAN'T STAND VULGARITIES AND ARE STILL READING THIS PLS GET LOST, IF NOT YOU WILL DIE READING THE NEXT SECTION--




i woke up at 6.30am first, then 7.00am (i got 2 alarm clocks, remember?) whoa... seriously damn tired... left the house at 7.30am... dunno whether is taiko or what, when i was crossing the road to the bus stop, the bus was already coming, so i didn't have to wait for the bus... anyway that was the bus to go to the main road only... at the main road then i take the bus to vs... 55 came like only after 5 minutes or less, so it was quite good... reached school at 8.15am... everybody was kinda slacking around... supposed to have da zu but wu lao shi was sick... but he still came to tiao2 instruments for us and watched us perform cai3 long2 chuan2 and pointed out our mistakes...yadda yadda yadda... and so clayton told me the band would perform at the area near the eco pond while we would be performing at the metal tables area, next to the bookshop... so everybody started moving the intruments down... when we were downstairs, i realised that the metal tables and chairs were still there... how are we supposed to perform like that with all the chairs and tables blocking? and so i asked around and they told me that band, co and choir are all performing at the same place, outside the eco-pond area... and i was like... what the cb sia... stupid fuckerz... then the band ask us whether we want to use their chairs or not, so of course i say want lar, if not need to shift like some shit... so i told the rest of the people to bring up the chairs (becos they brought the co chairs down) and so they put their instruments down, blocking the passageway, grumbled here and there, then brought up the chairs... then some people come and kao pei me ask tell me to move the instruments becos they blocking the fuking passageway... and so more people came down with chairs and their instruments... and instead of putting down the instruments to 1 corner, they just stunned at the passageway like some spastic asshole, effectively blocking the whole fuking shit... so i told them to put the instruments at 1 corner and bring up the chairs... and the sec 1 junior replied," huh? eh... i very confused... put what where again?" cb sia... bloody bastard... so i said again," put your instruments there (pointing to the corner) and bring up the chairs" and so i went to find clayton and told him that we are NOT performing at the metal tables, we are performing at the same place as the band, so we are expected to shift our instruments to their spot after they finished. and he was like... what the shit? then i added that the metal tables and chairs are still there, so it was originally planned that we perform at the same spot as the band... then clayton came downstairs and saw the condition we were in and said," heck care them lar... we move the tables and chairs to one side and just perform here lar..." (is that cool or what sia?) and so we did... so we had to ask the rest to bring down the chairs again... and they grumbled again... the av people then came to ask me whether we need microphones... i didn't know so i asked them whether the band needs them or not... he said they dun need because the music is very loud, so i said ok but we still need 1 mike for talking to the parents... and they replied that their sound system is actually spoiled -_-" stupid fukerz... waste my time... cb sia... then they said we can use band's one since they have their own microphones... so i said," whatever lar... later then see..." and when they walked away i secretly went to take one of their microphones and tested it... since it was working i just took it and gave it to clayton so he can talk to the parents watching... yadda yadda yadda... so clayton and i wanted them to put down their instruments because the parents or something are having a talk with principal because they were making HELL LOT OF NOISE... so clayton told them to put down their instruments and sit at the canteen tables and wait... when some cb face photographer (clayton said she was a teacher) asked us to sit down and play our instruments because she wants to take pictures of us playing... and then there was noise again... so i told them to fake playing becos people in the hall can surely hear us and they told me the photographer wanted them to play... and so i was like fine... whatever... and so i was so pissed i decided to take a walk around the school... and when i came back, i saw someone using tissue to wipe the timpani (as if she spilled something) and she was holding a cup of coffee... cb sia... then the lady told me that somebody spilled the drink on the sound system beside the timpani (whew!) and she was wiping it... after she wiped it, she gave me the fuking dirty tissue to wipe some more and left... some asshole... so i just threw the dirty tissue on the the sound system and just minded my own business... and so after the band and choir performed it was our turn... we played cai long chuan... still ok... then the dizi played their canon in d... still ok... besides the fact that when they were playing the song halfway somebody was announcing some shit on the pa system... and it wasn't like a few seconds... i think it was more like 1 minute... so during that 1 minute the dizi people can't hear what others are playing so they sort of screwed up... bastard sia... so the cycle repeated again... band played their song, followed by choir, then us... when it was decided that teerapong played his solo piece i realised that he will need the microphone and a microphone stand also... so i asked the av people to get a microphone stand and so the guy slowly walked to get the stand... and because we didn't know whether the choir have finished their performance or not (they were still standing there while the teacher was sitting down) when i went to ask them, the fuking teacher come and kao pei me, asking me how come they dun have microphones while WE have... they had asked the av people for microphones but they didn't get any while we have the microphones... pls lor... you all just sit there and expect everything to be done for you is it? WE got the microphone because we got it ourselves... we took the initiative to look for it ourselves while they wait for someone to serve them... think what? you queen is it? anyway i just kept quiet, left and told clayton that choir have finished their performance, and we can start ours... and after all that rubbish the av guy finally brought the stand and it was already time for our performance (we were going to play xian zi wu qu and then teerapong's solo...) so i began adjusting the microphone stand for teerapong when i realised that ann siong the bastard was going to start the xian zi wu qu without me (is he blind or what? during the exchange also like that...) and so by the time i went back to my place around 4 bars was played already so i just had to come in late by around 13 bars to sort of suit the song... anyway quite ok... we finished the song and it was time for teerapong's solo... the wushu teacher found out that he was playing zhan ma and so he got his wushu people to do their wushu shit while teerapong played his song... and while teerapong was playing, the fuking operations manager jefferey chia yeo hou had to announce on the pa system that "some car license plate number SDF206U" is blocking some other car or something, and of course, he had to repeat his announcement again so that fukers who didn't hear the first time can fuking hear his fuking voice again... yadda yadda yadda... and so after teerapong's performance band was supposed to play again, then choir then us but i didn't know what happened becos i was already bui3 song4 and i went up to the co room and camped there... so after like 30 minutes or so i decided to go down and my timing was perfect, everybody was beginning to bring up the instruments so i just brought my percussion stuff... and on the way, lance dropped the big cymbals and made a fuking loud noise... that made me even more pissed, however people around were laughing... and some woman laughingly said "got senior citizens here... cannot give a shock like that to us leh..." and so ok... i just lived with that... anyway after co i wanted to play soccer since i was free and i wanted to vent my frustrations... but damn, it rained and i had to go home...

at home, i took a 3-hour nap (becos i was damn tired) and woke up at around 7.15pm... watched a bit of tv, then switched on the computer... like always, i had to restart a few times before i can use it so it took around 30 minutes before i could finally use the computer... at around 9 something i went downstairs to help my mum carry up some of her groceries and while i was helping her, she some and kao pei me, saying that she always has to do groceries... need to carry so much stuff... etc etc then when she reached home and saw the computer on (i didn't switch it off, i just turned off the monitor) she come and kao pei me again... say what every time also use computer... use for the whole day... never rest your eyes... blah blah... and so i just ignored her and ate my dinner that she bought for me...

and that concludes my day when i slept at around 12 plus after talking to clayton on msn...

haiz... yesterday was quite a busy day so got no time to blog... first got co in the morning, then had to meet my mum and sis at orchard because had some private sale at isetan... then went to watch Ocean's Twelve at lido......

ok... maybe i'll start from the day before yesterday when i kena suan-ed by jing xuan again... she said i "very the no life"... haiz... all because of a guy called wilson... that was sort of the most hurtful insult i ever heard since i was pri 6 when my form teacher said i was "so irresponsible" (stupid ng F.Y... at least my initials dun stand for vulgarities right?)

so yesterday had co prac in the morning... i woke up at 6.45am to turn off my alarm clock and went back to sleep... then woke up again at 7.15am to turn off my second alarm clock (yup, i got 2 alarm clocks... so does my mum... and my sis has 3) and i washed up, changed, ate and left at 7.45am, just what i intended to do... i usually take 30 to 45 minutes (sometimes 1 hour because the freaking bus dun wanna come) to go to school and i reached school at 8.20am... and realised that the door was not opened yet... and so i waited and waited... sms-ed clayton... called ann siong... and so one by one they came... but neither of them had the key... and realised that hz had the key... he finally came at 9.10am when practice was supposed to start at 9am... and i wanted him to be pumped so that i can also pump my juniors...(ok...maybe i shouldn't have said that) and so practice went on and only 1 of my junior came... so i asked him to practise the xiao gu while i cut out the plastic (or rubber?) to sort of "mute" the snare drum... we got a new song and for percussion it was relatively easy...(maybe for me only?) and since it was so boring, i suggested to clayton to have a mini da zu for percussion, cello bass and tan bo... and so it was quite chaotic since everybody thought it was supposed to be fun or something...

anywayz... after ying kai told me that ann siong watched the exchange video of long teng a lot of times (maybe a few million times only lar...) to see cute little gillian playing the timpani, swinging her hair here and there (hey, it rhymes!), i went to ask him... he denied, however, but it was quite obvious he was lying... why? because whenever hz and i just keep saying "gillian gillian gillian gillian gillian gillian..." in front of ann siong his face will go red every time... like that also want to deny? kaoz... gillian should come see sia... haiz...

anyway i left school at around 2 something after co had ended. at one bus stop, i saw an auntie with her child (i think around 4 years old) boarding the bus... at that time the rain had almost stopped... however, she still had to open her umbrella to walk the 1 metre of unsheltered ground from the bus stop to the bus and i was like... wth... anyway, when i reached home, i slacked around for some time before bathing and preparing to go out again to meet my mum and sis...

when i met them, they brought me to the private sale at isetan to choose what i wanted...in the end, i bought a billabong t-shirt... when i was at orchard, i somehow had a gut feeling that i would meet someone i know (of course i was hoping for a girl) but alas, it was dennis with his friends... i saw him while i was on the escalator going up... he saw me too, but we aren't really that close so we just ignored each other... we ate our dinner at mosburger before going to the cinema... that was my first time eating at mosburger and the food was still ok... we then watched the movie... the front part of the movie was a little bit confusing because they were jumping from time to time (as in, they are showing what happened 3 years ago, the next minute they are showing what happened 2 weeks ago, and the next minute they are showing what happened 1 year ago) so it was quite confusing... but at least the show was good =)

after the movie we took a bus back home and i was sitting beside some 20-something-year-old girl and she was talking on her handphone (she was talking for a very long time, in fact, she was talking the whole time i was sitting beside her) at first she was talking to, i think, her boyfriend or something, and that guy must have asked her to go meet his parents because she kept declining and said that she never leaves a good first impression on her friends' parents... even za bo's parents also dun like her (from what i heard) and so i was like... dotz... anywayz she continued talking until, i think, her mother called and they started arguing... about what i dun know... and she kept saying "sui2 bian4 ni3 jiang3, ok? sui2 bian4 ni3 jiang3... (mumbles from her hp...) sui2 bian4 ni3 jiang3, ok, sui2 bian4... (mumbles fromt her hp) ok ok... sui2 bian4 ni3 jiang3 ok? wo3 mei2 you3 kong4 liao3 ok? bye bye..." and she hung up on the other party... she then continued to talk to the guy she was originally talking to... after not long though, they finished talking and she hung up... i thought that she would finally stop talking but noooo.... she then called her friend and when her friend picked up the phone, she said,"eh, siao za bo, hao ma? (laughs) siao za bo... (more laughs)" and by then i alighted from the bus liao... i think this is how people get such high phone bills... calling and talking for no reason... sheesh...

ok... i think i better start doing my hw liao... i should at least do 1...

hi... i'm back... sighz... just now on msn jing xuan asked me who i am again. haiz... kena suan... guess i'll forever be "invisible" to people...

hmmx... tomorrow got co... must remember to bring a blank cd to give weiliang so he can burn the exchange videos for me... hehe... anyway i think teerapong is damn hum ji. until now he still hasn't add the chang hui min to his msn yet... such a hum ji guy... like what so difficult about adding her... damn... i am seriously damn distracted... because i'm so bored, i'm listening to songs that i downloaded... "dradle song" from southpark... "kyle's mum's a bitch" also from southpark... "smoke on the water" by deep purple etc etc... haiz... haven't even started any of my holiday homework... i hope the teachers dun collect the hw sia...

anyway, i realised that ann siong will always defend gillian whenever someone directs something at her... (some two-timer... got gillian and zhao meng...) some more keep saying "gillian is cute lor..." kao pei...

*cough* ann siong sux *cough*

then ying kai's nick was something like "clayton, jing xuan luvs you. jing xuan, clayton luvs you" like what's his prob sia... and why is everybody crossing to other sections...? and jing xuan's nick was something like "ying kai craves for clayton and wants to gay with you..." or whatever... even worse sia...

hmmx... kenneth just sent me one of the pics during the exchange and it was a pic of me with all the rgco girls around me and i was smiling like some idiot... haha... hmm... that was at the start of the exchange... i was actually quite happy or something... but slowly as time went on i started feeling more and more moody... and by 4-5 pm, i actually felt so sian i wanted to go home... jian rong (of all people) saw me so moody and tried to cheer me up (of course to no effect) and so he played jun ma ben chi on his cello (it was the dizi part and the cello was supposed to play some soothing ban4 zou4)... actually jun ma ben chi is one of my all-time favourite song and the part he was playing was the part that i liked... when he finished playing that part , i gave him a weak smile and just left... (thanks anyway... i really appreciated it... like i always do...) and so after that my day (or night?) just got worse... no need to tell you you should know liao right? then after the performance jia yan and gillian helped carry some of the percussion instruments back to the co room... yar thanks but like what i said... they carried some of the instruments... why do stuff halfway one... anyway whatever lar... as i walked out with ann siong and clayton we passed by gillian and jia yan... of course i won't say anything (when have i ever did? i hate confrontations and hate talking to people face-to-face) they then bade goodbye to us and of course i remained silent and sort of dao-ed them... so at the school entrance ann siong and clayton said their fathers or whatever are going to fetch them... so i had to walk alone to the bus stop... and something happened on the way there... and so from far i could see ying kai and kenneth and yadda yadda yadda... and so i went home...

i'm wondering why i am talking about the exchange again... hmmx....

yay... my mum and my sis are out shopping so i have the whole house to myself until in the evening... that's great... whew, slept at 11.30pm yesterday after watching six weeks. quite a sad show, really... it's about a guy who found out that he had stomach cancer and only had six weeks to live... yadda yadda yadda yadda... and so yesterday was the last episode and he tried to live his life to the fullest... yadda yadda yadda... then when he had a week left to live, his doctor told him that they were a bit to hasty to tell him that he had only six weeks left to live.. so he actually could live longer if he went for an early treatment... yadda yadda yadda... when he reached home, his pregnant wife was going to give birth, so he hurried her to the hospital. in his hurry, he offended some egoistic and self-centred guy with his friends... and in the end, the egoistic guy and his friends beat him to death... how ironic... and so his son was born on the day he died...

anyway...... shit... i lost my train of thought listening to the dradle song by southpark... it's a really funny song by southpark... everybody should go download... hahaz...

sighz... i think i will blog again later...

Haiz... went to my grand-auntie's house for Christmas yesterday.... we go there every year for christmas to sort of pay our respects as it is my grand-uncle's birthday... and as you know... old people always like to speak in dialects (in my case it's teochew) and i dun really know how to speak teochew.... at first, it was still ok because none of them spoke to me in teochew. but at around 9.30pm, as my father was going to fetch my grandma home, my grand-auntie suddenly asked me, "jo ni li bo gat li pa ki" or something like that... and i replied,"ar... wa... buey hiao tia..." which means i dun know how to hear and my other grand-auntie overheard and said, "li buey hio tia... buey hiao si hokkien oue... buey hio si teochew oue... anyway, your grand-auntie is asking why you not following your father out." yup, my other grand-auntie knew how to speak english... and so i replied that my father is just fetching my grandma home first... in english of course...

anyway this year's christmas is a bit like crap, i only got like 3 presents... one is from my father, a pair of chopsticks with a fifty dollar note around it... a robinson's voucher... and a pair of drumsticks (which i already have a cooler version... anyway it's the thought that counts right? so thanks, cousin...)

i shall now go brush up on my teochew speaking...

ok... if you haven't noticed yet... i changed some stuff on the blog to sort of make it look nicer... (although i'm not doing very well...) since i just LOVE drums, i decided to put drums here and there...

so... i woke up today at 10.30am... DAMN!!!... which means i only slept for like 9 hours only... a bit less from the 10 hours which i really need... anyway, oh yar...forgot... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! ... lousy christmas siah today... no presents no whatever... just because my auntie's family went to china or something and we always go there to celebrate... so, no auntie...no celebration...no presents... sigh...

sianz...

Damn it siah... i tried to change the outlook of my blog again... (yar yar... i can't help it...) and i screwed it up again...... ah, but this time i am smart... i copied and saved the whole script before changing it and after screwing it all up, i pasted back the original script and everything was back to normal... (yar yar... ok... i am lame...) which also means i just wasted like 4 to 5 hours trying to make my blog look nicer and failing...

...............DAMMIT!!!!!

wow... yesterday slept at 12 midnight and woke up at 2 pm today... 12 hours of sleep!!! but not as bad as on wednesday... slept for 15 hours... that's still my record though... 15 hours...

anyway i slept so late because i was talking to yu ching... and i was asking what was going on between her and ying kai... and she said...... aahhh... better not say... lol... actually we talked about the combined performance first... about long teng... obviously i haven't really gotten over it... and she said that she almost stopped playing halfway because she was laughing too hard because of me??? siah lar... kena suan... by sec 2 some more... then she talked about ying kai... saying about how he was trying to *ahem* her... hehheh... can't believe it siah... i thought he had a gurlfriend called cheryl or something... "he's so fickle"... hehheh... but hey... i had to tell her something just for her to tell me this lor...( why are gurls like that one...?) then i said that i was scared of jing xuan because she looks damn fierce... hehheh... after persuading her some more then she started talking more about ying kai... hehe

ok... better not talk about them liao... wait she kill me or something... anyway yar... during my 12 hours of sleep, i actually had quite a weird dream... (not surprising though) my dream starts in the airport... when my mother and i went to meet my... (yipes...better skip this part)... so ya, then suddenly we realised that there were people trying to kill us. then....

(went to eat lunch and come back... okok... i'm lame.. yu ching did say i was guai though... because i went to fold my clothes halfway while talking to her... am i really? hmmx..)

anyway... then suddenly i was like on a theme park ride along with 2 other person and we are strapped to a seat (like those roller coaster rides thingy) and suddenly the seats start falling (like those theme park rides that fall from great heights). we actually start from the the top of a volcano and we are dropped into the core of the volcano, very near the burning lava. then like as if the ride ends, the seats start going back up. but not mine!! after that i realised that there was someone trying to cut the rope holding my seat (ya, i know... it's weird) so i started climbing up the rope to reach the platform he was on. actually technically it's not a platform... it's actually just 2 metal bars that he was standing on... so i climbed to the bars and suddenly i was doing jackie chan stunts swinging from the bars while the guy was trying to step on my fingers... after some time, i finally kicked him off the platform into the burning lava (hehheh) and i think i somehow escaped or something... after that i found myself at home and there were 2 suspicious characters outside my door and they were trying to figure out like how to kill me or something... for example like knocking on the door, so when i look through the peephole, they will shoot me in the eye or something... anyway after they went away, another couple came (a younger couple) and they were also trying to figure out how to kill me (what the...?!) then the guy came walking out to my window (mind you, i sort of live in the corner block so there is nothing to walk on outside my window...) and i was like stunned... i looked outside at what he was standing on and realised he was standing on what seems like a concrete extension from the corridor. he was looking into the house and didn't realise that he was going to walk off the edge... (hahah...) and he did. his friend, girlfriend, whatever was still outside my door trying to look in... but somehow she was tired and decided to sit outside my door... and then realised that her butt was stuck in the gate (lol...) she then nudged herself until she was free and realising that her friend, boyfriend, whatever just fell to his death... she did the same...... after that, (yar, i know... haven't end yet... but going to end soon, i promise...) there was this guy who appeared outside my door and asked if i wanted a prostitute...??? he then moved to one side to uncover something like 4 girls standing behind him wearing those skimpy outfits (i dun think they are even chio...) i was damn pissed and i shouted,"GET LOST LAR...!!! **** ***!!!" and they got lost...

and i woke up... ya i know it's a long dream but hey... 12 hours is a long time...

wah...i read the blogs of other people like hong zhou...daniel...jing xuan...etc etc and i realised that my blog looks like shit. feel damn zi4 bei1 siah... (is that the correct word to use? sorry...my chinese suck...) but nvm... this time i'm not going to care because the last time i did the whole blog kena screwed...

i also read ann siong's blog...he said that he spent the whole day learning long teng (gu3 duan4 part) from me... yarh that was true... then he said that i so pro... cock siah... my morale still super-low lor... after that horrific performance... then he also say what must pray to those who know ling zou part... keefe and me... rubbish...

then i read hong zhou's blog... he was talking about the exchange programme combined performance... he said that the best performance was still long teng and i'm like wth? maybe he is just ignorant or something... (no offence, hz)

after that i read jing xuan's blog (okok..i know i'm lame... reading other people's blog like free... anyway it IS free what...so sue me) she was talking about having to go down the stairs and then coming back up because the door was locked... then taking the lift which was very freaky because it stopped at almost every floor on the way down... actually, there was somebody pressing the lift on every floor (haha... oh sorry... i'm not supposed to laugh...) BUT IT'S NOT ME... actually i was climbing down the stairs and i saw a group of people laughing and pressing the lift, then going to the next floor to press the lift again... heh heh... pretty funny actually... boy, i hope she doesn't read this siah... she seems to scare me a little bit because she looks damn fierce... well, i have never talked to her and maybe i am just being paranoid (but she does intimidate me actually... heh heh...)

hmmx...anyway after my cocking up i changed my msn nick and suddenly no one knew me... they started asking me "who are you?" then when i reply, they say "oh....i didn't know..." sigh... maybe i am just one of those people whom nobody will notice i'm there... i bet jing xuan dun even know me lor...

well... i also posted on the vsco forum that i will never play long teng again.... and they actually replied! usually everybody will ignore me... honestly, those replies really brought up my morale... (although by just a little bit...) so... thanks, i really appreciate that.

hmmx...it's been like 1 month? since the last post? it's because my blog was like so dull and boring and it looks horrible...so i tried to make it nice and all that...but in the end...(haha) i screwed up the html and everything went wrong... so now i made a new blog (but with same old url and all that) and i am not going to care about how my blog looks like...(although i know it sucks)

anywayz... yesterday was the exchange programme with RGCO and for the combined performance with them (percussion and woodwind played long teng hu yue) i cocked up like some shit... i was playing ling zou(sort of like the leading person) and i screwed the whole shit up... during the practice before the performance, i already had a big blister on my finger from the drumsticks because they were rubbing against my skin...(yes, i know i suck... i must be the suckiest percussionist ever siah...who ever heard of having a blister just from the drumstick? ann siong kept saying "wah...so pro...can get blister..." but i subjected myself to being one of the suckiest, if not the most suckiest, percussionist in the world) and that was only before the performance. so during the performance the drumsticks was rubbing against my blister the whole time i was playing and it hurts.like.hell. and so i vow never to play long teng hu yue or ling zou ever again (or at least in the near future) never again will i play long teng or ling zou ever. believe me, it's that horrible... it was so horrible that on the way to the bus stop... i actually cried... sad to say... yeah...maybe i am just being harsh on myself, but this is the way i am... i'm harsh on my juniors... i'm harsh on myself...

one last thing... i am never ever ever ever ever going to play long teng again. did i say that already? oh ok...